Last night my Husband and I went for a movie, what used to be part of our routine i.e. to watch atleast one movie a week now seemed like an opportunity that we have been waiting to get!! Why? coz now we have a baby smile emoticon and to go for a movie we need my mum to baby sit apart from the baby sitting she does when i work. So we wait for the movies we really want to see and give others a miss.
I cannot even tell you how much the wait was worth to watch KI & KA. R.Balki has outdone himself this time, it was not the issue about gender which is the hot selling topic but about human beings and their need for power.
Infact i went with the assumption that it will be about the working woman and a house husband whose ego will eventually get the better of him and he will not be able to handle his wife’s success. To my surprise the reverse happened, a famous successful wife could not handle the fame and attention the homemaker husband got. Thus reinforcing the belief that power has nothing to do with gender but with humans as beings…… for this power battles are fought, lives are sacrificed and homes are destroyed. Ever wondered why is this power so important to us, my guess is that somewhere it makes us feel secure, protected; like survival of the fittest. This basic instinct to survive still holds true its only a different scenario from a jungle to a city.
The other thing that the film portrayed was how secure the man was with himself, with the choices he made that even when the insecure, jealous wife kept lashing out he remained calm and was willing to give up that fame as the fame had come by default his main aim was to make a home and value the relationships he had. This makes me think that most of time the way we act really stems from the insecurities we feel. It is so easy to give in to them and react with anger, frustration, guilt without thinking of the impact it will have on the other; because we are all the time so busy protecting ourselves. It is the individuals who are secure from within and do not need external reassurances are the ones who have nurturing relationships and fulfilling lives.
The other aspect that really made an impact on me was Jaya Bachchan’s reply to her husband about making a choice to give up her acting career and be a stay at home mom. She said “I made a choice because i had no other choice.” I feel a lot of women especially in urban India would echo this sentiment. Will a man give up his career once a baby comes along, will the wife be ok with being the bread winner, as a couple will they be able to face the judging eyes of the society. Again it isn’t about genders it is about the conditioning that we grow up with that a man is suppose to be the provider and the woman a nurturer. And this conditioning starts from the time a baby is born and we pass it on to generations.
I wish we would raise our kids to be creative, sensitive, secure and responsible individuals instead of becoming a part of the gender stereotyping and eventually part of the rat race.